 |
 |
 |
 |
Want to feel emotionally better? You have heard of the term concious and subconcious. So what's that all about and what has this to do with feeling emotionally better?
Our concious brain is the bit that we are aware of, the part that we use all the time. It's the here and now, the things we think about such as 'what to do next' etc. The subconcious is the part that deals with automatic functions such as heart rate, breathing etc. Not surprisingly our brain can move information between the two, for example your heart rate can increase if you are concious of a threat, just like when you climb some stairs you may take notice of the first two then your subconcious takes over. It can do that even when its not a very clever idea such as when you are driving. How many times have people said I drove along a stretch of road and can't remember certain bits of it? They are driving with the subconcious part of the brain.
This was used for the first burglar alarm. In castles in England they would make one step on a flight of stairs higher, shorter or longer than the rest. If you have been up and down then a thousand times your subconcious takes account of this. If you haven't then you will probably trip over. The idea was that the soldiers within the castle would practice and practice these stairs so in the height of battle they could run up and down and let their subconcious do the walking. Of course the enemy became wise to this but in all honestly if someone is running at you with a sword, do you really have time to concentrate on the stairs?
So you could almost say we have two brains, the one we think with and the one that does the boring bits in the background. So how does the subconcious learn anything? Practice. You don't focus on every step you take, it's just not possible, so what we really mean by a child has learned to walk is that they have had sufficient practice for the subconcious mind to take over this basic function and leave the brain free to focus on picking up that cup and not pouring the contents on the floor. But the subconcious brain doesn't just deal with 'motor functions' which need muscles like walking, it has the incredible ability to learn 'feelings' as well. Here's proof.
Personally, not to everyones liking, I like a bacon sandwich. OK, if you are a vegetarian I do apologise, but hear me through. I walk along and I'm not conciously sniffing the air. Frankly I'm too busy thinking about what happened yesterday and what is supposed to happen tomorrow. Then my subconcious picks up that aroma. My subconcious starts production of saliva ready for food. I didn't do that. I had no control over my affection for a bacon sandwich. I ate one years ago, enjoyed it and did it again. Eventually my subconcious learned what I like and took over the basic functions for me. How clever is that.
Now enjoying my sandwich was a feeling, an emotion, not a motor function so my subconcious can learn both the practical and the emotional. So when bad things happen, like someone tells me I am stupid, it's a bad feeling. If the next day someone tells me I am stupid it's another bad feeling. My subconcious starts to take notice. Eventually tell me often enough how stupid I am and I really do believe it. My subconcious takes this on board and the negative feelings that go with it. Never, ever, tell a child they are stupid. Made a mistake, need to be more careful, look out for traffic. But never 'stupid'.
Well I am not stupid. I know that because I told myself so many times that the earlier learning has been replaced. My subconcious knows I am not stupid so therefore I believe it. This reinforces the feeling in a positive way. Get it? If you say today is a good day the first few times (or even many times depending on your previous 'learning') you won't necessarily believe it. But you will eventually because it's true. Today is a great day and if anyone asks how you know that then tell them the truth. It's simply because it is.
What has all of that to do with friendship only websites? Possibly nothing, maybe quite a lot. Part of our emotional health is linked to interaction with others. Looking for new friends? Here's two websites to consider....
Couples only, friendship only.
Singles only, friendship only.
|
 |
 |
 |
 |
|
|
